{"id":369,"date":"2018-03-28T10:38:48","date_gmt":"2018-03-28T10:38:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/?p=369"},"modified":"2018-03-28T10:38:48","modified_gmt":"2018-03-28T10:38:48","slug":"comunicarea-asertiva-pe-intelesul-adolescentilor-sau-cum-sa-comunic-eficient","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/2018\/03\/28\/comunicarea-asertiva-pe-intelesul-adolescentilor-sau-cum-sa-comunic-eficient\/","title":{"rendered":"Comunicarea asertiv\u0103 pe \u00een\u0163elesul adolescen\u0163ilor sau cum s\u0103 comunic eficient"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Pentru o comunicare corect\u0103 este important s\u0103 respec\u0163i urm\u0103toarele trei reguli<\/strong>:<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. S\u0103 transmi\u0163i ceea ce dore\u0219ti s\u0103 spui c\u00e2t mai clar, pentru ca cealalt\u0103 persoan\u0103 s\u0103 \u00een\u0163eleag\u0103 exact ceea ce tu dore\u0219ti s\u0103-i transmi\u0163i;\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n
  2. S\u0103 ascul\u0163i ceea ce persoana cealalt\u0103 dore\u0219te s\u0103-\u0163i transmit\u0103 prin mesajul pe care \u0163i-l comunic\u0103.<\/span><\/li>\n
  3. S\u0103 spui ceea ce sim\u0163i \u00een leg\u0103tur\u0103 cu ceea ce \u0163i s-a comunicat.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Pentru a putea \u00eendeplini cele trei reguli de mai sus, este important s\u0103 \u00eenve\u0163i s\u0103 comunici asertiv \u0219i s\u0103 \u00eenve\u0163i s\u0103 spui \u201enu\u201d.<\/span><\/p>\n

    \u00a0 \u00a0 S\u0103 spun eu NU? Oric\u00e2nd!<\/strong>\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0\"\"<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

    \u00a0 \u00a0 Cu siguran\u0163\u0103 au existat momente \u00een via\u0163a ta \u00een care ai fi dorit s\u0103 spui \u201enu\u201d, sau s\u0103 refuzi pe cineva, dar nu ai avut curajul s\u0103 o faci din diferite motive: s\u0103 nu \u00ee\u0163i superi familia, s\u0103 nu cread\u0103 cei din jurul t\u0103u c\u0103 nu ai curaj s\u0103 faci un anumit lucru sau poate ai avut o p\u0103rere diferit\u0103 fa\u0163\u0103 de a prietenilor t\u0103i, dar ai acceptat s\u0103 spui \u201eda\u201d \u00een loc de \u201enu\u201d, pentru a nu fi exlus din anturaj.<\/span><\/p>\n

    \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Asta \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 accep\u0163i s\u0103 faci ceva ce nu dore\u0219ti, \u00eempotriva voin\u0163ei tale. Cuv\u00e2ntul \u201cDA\u201d pe care \u00eel spui atunci c\u00e2nd de fapt ai fi dorit, dar nu ai avut curajul s\u0103 spui \u201cNU\u201d, este de fapt un \u201cDA\u201d mincinos, fals!<\/span><\/p>\n

    \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Primul lucru pe care \u00eel ai de f\u0103cut este s\u0103 recuno\u0219ti c\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i este greu s\u0103 spui \u201cNU\u201d. De ce oare este a\u0219a de greu s\u0103 spui \u201cNU\u201d \u00een anumite situa\u0163ii? De ce de multe ori preferi s\u0103 spui \u201eda\u201d de\u0219i \u0219tii c\u0103 este posibil ca apoi s\u0103 ai probleme?<\/span><\/p>\n

    \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Cui nu i s-a \u00eent\u00e2mplat s\u0103 spun\u0103 o minciun\u0103 \u201cc\u00e2t casa\u201d numai ca s\u0103 scape de o situa\u0163ie nepl\u0103cut\u0103, c\u00e2nd ar fi putut s\u0103 spun\u0103 un simplu \u201cNU\u201d? De ce alegi s\u0103 te \u00eencurci \u00een propriile tale minciuni c\u00e2nd ai putea de fapt s\u0103 spui \u201cNU\u201d?<\/span><\/p>\n

    \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Unul dintre motivele care \u00eei \u00eempiedic\u0103 pe oameni s\u0103 spun\u0103 \u201enu\u201d, este educa\u021bia pe care au primit-o acas\u0103. O mare parte din educa\u021bia noastr\u0103 ne oblig\u0103 s\u0103 \u00eei respect\u0103m pe adul\u021bii din jurul nostru, s\u0103 ne supunem \u0219i s\u0103 \u00eei ascult\u0103m. De exemplu s\u0103 nu ne punem \u201e\u00een gur\u0103\u201d cu p\u0103rin\u021bii, s\u0103 nu-i contrazicem, c\u0103 altfel \u201eo \u00eencas\u0103m\u201d!<\/span><\/p>\n

    \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Ne este team\u0103 s\u0103 spunem nu celor mai b\u0103tr\u00e2ni sau celor pe care \u00eei iubim pentru ca s\u0103 nu \u00eei sup\u0103r\u0103m, ca s\u0103 nu fim respin\u0219i de ace\u0219tia sau s\u0103 nu cumva s\u0103 nu mai fim iubi\u021bi \u0219i aprecia\u021bi de cei din jurul nostru. Ne este team\u0103 s\u0103 fim considera\u021bi egoi\u0219ti sau lipsi\u021bi de inim\u0103!<\/span><\/p>\n

    Oare nu cumva spunem \u201cDA\u201d doar ca s\u0103 nu ne punem r\u0103u cu familia sau cu prietenii?<\/span><\/p>\n

    \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 De ce ne este fric\u0103 s\u0103 spunem \u201cNU\u201d?<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

      \n
    1. Ne este fric\u0103 s\u0103 nu fim judeca\u0163i, critica\u0163i sau evalua\u0163i negativ de cei din jurul nostru;<\/span><\/li>\n
    2. Ne este fric\u0103 s\u0103 nu fim exclu\u0219i sau respin\u0219i dintr-un colectiv;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

      \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Cum po\u0163i comunica asertiv cu cei din jurul t\u0103u?<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

      \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 A avea curajul s\u0103 spui \u201cNU\u201d nu \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 trebuie s\u0103 intri \u00een conflict sau s\u0103 te cer\u0163i cu cei din jurul t\u0103u. Este important s\u0103 spui ceea ce sim\u0163i \u00een leg\u0103tur\u0103 cu ceea ce se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 \u0219i dore\u0219ti s\u0103 \u00eei comunici celeilalte persoane.<\/span><\/p>\n

        \n
      1. Folose\u0219te pronumele la persoana \u00eent\u00e2i \u201cEU\u201d \u00een formularea propozi\u0163iilor<\/strong><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

        \u201cEu sunt nemul\u0163umit de felul cum \u00eemi vorbe\u0219ti\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

        \u201cEu m\u0103 simt bine c\u00e2nd tu \u00eemi spui c\u0103 am rezolvat bine tema pentru acas\u0103 \u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

        \u201c\u00cemi place c\u00e2nd m\u0103 aju\u0163i\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

        \u201cEu cred c\u0103 proiectul t\u0103u a fost foarte bun\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

          \n
        1. Spune ceea ce sim\u0163i, ce emo\u0163ii tr\u0103ie\u0219ti<\/strong><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

          \u201cSunt furios \u0219i a\u0219 dori s\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i spun ceea ce m\u0103 face s\u0103 m\u0103 simt a\u0219a\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

          \u201cM\u0103 simt vinovat pentru ceea ce am f\u0103cut\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

          \u201cSunt nervos \u0219i a\u0219 vrea s\u0103 m\u0103 la\u0219i s\u0103 m\u0103 calmez, iar apoi voi veni s\u0103 discut\u0103m despre ceea ce s-a \u00eent\u00e2mplat\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

            \n
          1. Fii empatic, adic\u0103 spune-i celeilalte persoane c\u0103 o \u00een\u0163elegi <\/strong><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

            \u201c\u015etiu c\u0103 e\u0219ti ocupat, dar a\u0219 dori s\u0103 m\u0103 aju\u0163i cu ceva\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

            \u201c\u00cen\u0163eleg c\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i este greu s\u0103 respec\u0163i acest\u0103 regul\u0103, \u00eens\u0103 a\u0219 prefera s\u0103 \u00eencerci s\u0103 faci acest lucru a\u0219a cum \u00eel fac \u0219i eu\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

              \n
            1. Exprim\u0103 care sunt consecin\u0163ele<\/strong><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

              \u201cDac\u0103 vei continua s\u0103 te compor\u0163i ur\u00e2t cu mine, va trebui s\u0103 le spun p\u0103rin\u0163ilor, dar a\u0219 prefera s\u0103 nu trebuiasc\u0103 s\u0103 fac acest lucru.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

              \u201cDac\u0103 se mai \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 s\u0103 m\u0103 amenin\u0163i, voi fi nevoit s\u0103 merg la directorul \u0219colii \u0219i s\u0103 le spun p\u0103rin\u0163ilor mei. A\u0219 prefera s\u0103 nu fac asta.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

                \n
              1. Exprimarea sentimentelor negative<\/strong><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

                \u201cAtunci c\u00e2nd m\u0103 \u00eentrerupi de la teme, trebuie s\u0103 reiau anumite idei pentru a nu gre\u0219i. Acest lucru m\u0103 deranjeaz\u0103 \u0219i a\u0219 prefera s\u0103 a\u0219tep\u0163i p\u00e2n\u0103 termin.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

                \u201cC\u00e2nd nu \u00eemi r\u0103spunzi la telefon m\u0103 \u00eengrijorez c\u0103 s-a \u00eent\u00e2mplat ceva r\u0103u \u0219i m\u0103 enervez. A\u0219 aprecia foarte mult dac\u0103 m-ai suna \u0219i mi-ai spune dinainte ceea ce va urma s\u0103 faci.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

                  \n
                1. Repet\u0103 calm \u0219i relaxat acela\u0219i lucru de c\u00e2te ori este necesar pentru ca cealalt\u0103 persoan\u0103 s\u0103 \u00een\u0163eleag\u0103<\/strong><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

                  Prietenul t\u0103u: <\/strong>\u00cemi po\u0163i \u00eemprumuta 20 de lei?<\/span><\/p>\n

                  Tu:<\/strong> Nu \u00ee\u0163i pot \u00eemprumuta bani. Nu mai am.<\/span><\/p>\n

                  Prietenul t\u0103u: <\/strong>\u0162i-i voi da \u00eenapoi \u00een c\u00e2teva zile. Am nevoie de ei. E\u0219ti prietenul meu, nu?<\/span><\/p>\n

                  Tu:<\/strong> Nu \u00ee\u0163i pot \u00eemprumuta bani.<\/span><\/p>\n

                  Prietenu t\u0103u: <\/strong>Dac\u0103 tu ai avea nevoie, eu te-a\u0219 \u00eemprumuta. Nu vei sim\u0163i lipsa la 20 de lei.<\/span><\/p>\n

                  Tu:<\/strong> Sunt prietenul t\u0103u dar nu \u00ee\u0163i pot \u00eemprumuta nimic… Am r\u0103mas f\u0103r\u0103 bani.<\/span><\/p>\n

                  \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 De ce este important s\u0103 \u00eenve\u0163i s\u0103 spui \u201cNU\u201d?<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

                  Aleg s\u0103 spun \u201eNU\u201d pentru c\u0103:<\/span><\/p>\n