{"id":410,"date":"2018-05-12T12:29:35","date_gmt":"2018-05-12T12:29:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/?p=410"},"modified":"2018-05-12T12:29:35","modified_gmt":"2018-05-12T12:29:35","slug":"frica-de-respingere-sau-atunci-cand-nimeni-nu-ma-vrea","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/2018\/05\/12\/frica-de-respingere-sau-atunci-cand-nimeni-nu-ma-vrea\/","title":{"rendered":"FRICA DE RESPINGERE&#8230; sau atunci c\u00e2nd nimeni nu m\u0103 vrea"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 <img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-411\" src=\"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/Frica-de-respingere-sau-atunci-cand-nimeni-nu-ma-vrea-244x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"244\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/Frica-de-respingere-sau-atunci-cand-nimeni-nu-ma-vrea-244x300.jpg 244w, https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/Frica-de-respingere-sau-atunci-cand-nimeni-nu-ma-vrea.jpg 391w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 244px) 100vw, 244px\" \/>Rana de respingere este prima ran\u0103 care poate apare \u00een via\u021ba noastr\u0103, \u00eenc\u0103 din perioada intrauterin\u0103, c\u00e2nd copilul poate interioriza emo\u021biile tr\u0103ite de mam\u0103 \u00een leg\u0103tur\u0103 cu venirea lui pe lume. <\/span><!--more--><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 P\u0103rintele uneori nu-\u0219i dore\u0219te copilul, poate nu dore\u0219te acel sex, poate nu-l dore\u0219te din cauza contextului \u2013 situa\u021bie financiar\u0103, v\u00e2rsta prea fraged\u0103 a mamei, conflictele din familie, stresul. Frica mamei de a avea un copil se transmite acestuia chiar din momentul conceperii. Mai t\u00e2rziu, situa\u021biile nepl\u0103cute, incapacitatea mamei de a face fa\u021b\u0103 situa\u021biei noi, lipsa unui ajutor din afar\u0103, problemele de s\u0103n\u0103tate ale mamei sau ale copilului, pot \u00eent\u0103ri aceast\u0103 ran\u0103, mama nemaif\u0103c\u00e2nd fa\u021b\u0103 \u00een nevoia de a acorda aten\u021bia necesar\u0103 copilului. Astfel, copilul se simte respins. La fel este \u0219i respingerea din partea tat\u0103lui, care nu are capacitatea de a empatiza, de a fi al\u0103turi emo\u021bional de copilul s\u0103u. Aceast\u0103 ran\u0103 este foarte profund\u0103, cel care sufer\u0103 se simte respins \u00een fiin\u021ba lui \u0219i consider\u0103 c\u0103 nu are dreptul de a exista. Din frica de a nu fi respins, persoana \u00ee\u0219i va construi masca fugarului. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Cei care ne resping apar \u00een via\u0163a noastr\u0103 pentru a ne ar\u0103ta c\u00e2t de mult ne respingem pe noi \u00een\u015fine, fugarul atr\u0103g\u00e2nd adesea persoane sau situa\u021bii care \u00eei produc panic\u0103.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 <strong>\u00a0Iat\u0103 c\u00e2teva comportamente specifice persoanei care are rana respingerii:<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Persoana care se simte respins\u0103 este mereu panicat\u0103, de\u0219i declar\u0103 c\u0103 nu-i este team\u0103 de nimic. Prima reac\u021bie la panic\u0103 este aceea de a se salva, de a se ascunde sau de a fugi. Din cauza fricii \u00ee\u0219i pierde uneori memoria, uit\u0103 ce vrea s\u0103 spun\u0103, crez\u00e2nd c\u0103 are dificult\u0103\u021bi de memorie. Fugarul intr\u0103 \u00een panic\u0103 \u0219i r\u0103m\u00e2ne blocat \u00een fa\u021ba p\u0103rintelui sau altor persoane de acela\u0219i sex;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Refuz\u0103 s\u0103 se ata\u0219eze de tot ceea ce este material din frica incon\u0219tient\u0103 de a nu putea fugi atunci c\u00e2nd vrea s\u0103 se autoprotejeze;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Persoana care are aceast\u0103 ran\u0103 este cea mai predispus\u0103 la ur\u0103. Poate trece cu u\u0219urin\u021b\u0103 de la \u201emarea iubire\u201d la ur\u0103 profund\u0103, fapt care confirm\u0103 uzura sufleteasc\u0103 \u00een care tr\u0103ie\u0219te permanent;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Este foarte re\u021binut \u00een a avea o rela\u021bie cu p\u0103rintele de acela\u0219i sex \u0219i \u00ee\u0219i creeaz\u0103 strategii abile de a nu-\u0219i respinge p\u0103rintele, de\u0219i nu se simte confortabil \u00een rela\u021bie cu acesta. Are resentimente \u00eempotriva lui, \u00eel poate ur\u00ee, nu-l accept\u0103 ca om \u0219i p\u0103rinte \u0219i \u00een consecin\u021b\u0103 nu-l consider\u0103 un model demn de urmat. De cele mai multe ori, p\u0103rintele de acela\u0219i sex s-a sim\u021bit la r\u00e2ndul lui \u0219i el respins de p\u0103rintele lui de acela\u0219i sex, aceast\u0103 ran\u0103 fiind transmis\u0103 pe linie transgenera\u021bional\u0103. Deoarece \u00eei este foarte greu s\u0103 se ierte, persoana nu va recunoa\u0219te resentimentele \u0219i ranchiuna fa\u021b\u0103 de p\u0103rintele s\u0103u;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Din cauza fricii de a fi respins are \u00een general foarte pu\u021bini prieteni \u0219i creeaz\u0103 strategii de \u201ea fi invizibil\u201d. Devine singur, izolat de societate \u0219i nu de pu\u021bine ori se simte respins de cei din jur \u2013 mereu spune: &#8230;nu vrea s\u0103 se \u00eent\u00e2lnesc\u0103 cu mine&#8230;. cred c\u0103 nu m\u0103 place&#8230;. nu am cu cine rela\u021biona&#8230; \u00cei este fric\u0103 c\u0103 nu va fi acceptat de ceilal\u021bi, fugarul nu \u00een\u021belege c\u0103 respingerea e \u201edoar \u00een capul lui\u201d \u0219i c\u0103 g\u0103se\u0219te justific\u0103ri pentru asta \u2013 dec\u00e2t s\u0103 suf\u0103r din cauza respingerii mai bine m\u0103 ascund!<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Fugarul se va \u00eendrepta spre profesii care \u00eel ajut\u0103 s\u0103 evadeze, va lucra de multe ori singur sau va fi plecat foarte mult de acas\u0103;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Aceast\u0103 ran\u0103 ne afecteaz\u0103 capacitatea de comunicare. Persoana \u00ee\u0219i exprim\u0103 cu greu opiniile \u0219i \u00eei este fric\u0103 de judecata celorlal\u021bi: se face de r\u00e2s, nu e important ceea ce spune, este f\u0103r\u0103 valoare, este ascultat din polite\u021be. Dac\u0103 vrea s\u0103 cear\u0103 ceva cuiva, nu \u00eendr\u0103zne\u0219te, deoarece consider\u0103 c\u0103 nu e suficient de \u00eemportant pentru a se deranja cineva pentru el;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">C\u00e2nd este t\u00e2n\u0103r, deoarece are probleme cu propria-i identitate, va fi tentat de a se mula \u0219i de a se pierde \u00een personalitatea celui care \u00eel accept\u0103, \u00eel va admira \u0219i \u00eel va sui pe un piedestal;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Se devalorizeaz\u0103, se compar\u0103 cu cei din jur \u0219i nu se consider\u0103 demn de iubire. Deoarece au o imagine de sine negativ\u0103 pot avea tendin\u021ba de a deveni perfec\u021bioni\u0219ti pentru a c\u0103p\u0103ta valoare \u0219i pre\u021buire \u00een ochii celorlal\u021bi. Perfec\u021bionismul se cl\u0103de\u0219te \u0219i pe frica de a nu fi judeca\u021bi \u00een cazul \u00een care vor gre\u0219i, judecata fiind perceput\u0103 ca \u0219i respingere;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">\u00cen ad\u00e2ncul sufletului fugarul nu-\u0219i g\u0103se\u0219te lini\u0219tea, e mereu \u00een alert\u0103, nu-\u0219i g\u0103se\u0219te sensul existen\u021bei. \u00ce\u0219i va crea incon\u0219tient situa\u021bii de evadare din grupuri, spre locuri noi, locuri de munc\u0103 noi, \u021b\u0103ri noi, poate \u00ee\u0219i va g\u0103si sensul, dreptul lui de a exista;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Acest copil \u00ee\u0219i va crea o lume imaginar\u0103, este cuminte \u0219i lini\u0219tit, nu creeaz\u0103 probleme, nu face mult zgomot. Mai mult, dac\u0103 vede c\u0103 cineva \u201ea uitat\u201d de existen\u021ba lui se simte bine pentru c\u0103 va anula astfel posibila panic\u0103;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Aproape de fiecare dat\u0103, mama unui astfel de copil are inten\u021bia de a-l supraproteja. Copilului i se spune mereu c\u0103 e neputincios, incapabil s\u0103 fac\u0103 unele lucruri, p\u0103rin\u021bii g\u00e2ndesc \u00een locul lui, p\u00e2n\u0103 c\u00e2nd acesta interiorizeaz\u0103 modul \u00een care func\u021bioneaz\u0103 \u0219i r\u0103m\u00e2ne infantilizat, f\u0103r\u0103 a avea \u00eencredere \u00een el, f\u0103r\u0103 a ac\u021biona, f\u0103r\u0103 a lua ini\u021biativa. Copilul se simte respins pentru c\u0103 i se impune \u201eun scenariu\u201d dup\u0103 care s\u0103 func\u021bioneze, \u201escenariul\u201d lui nefiind bun, calit\u0103\u021bile lui nefiind apreciate. Un astfel de copil, c\u00e2nd va deveni adult, va sim\u021bi iubirea ca pe o sufocare \u0219i va fugi din rela\u021bii de frica de a nu i se impune modul cum s\u0103-\u0219i tr\u0103iasc\u0103 via\u021ba;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Persoanele care au acest\u0103 ran\u0103 pot avea dificult\u0103\u021bi \u00een a accepta sexualitatea, iar frica de a nu fi respin\u0219i \u00eei va determina pe ei \u00een\u0219i\u0219i s\u0103 resping\u0103 un poten\u021bial partener. Acest fapt se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103 deoarece se simt respin\u0219i de persoanele de acela\u0219i sex \u0219i le este team\u0103 s\u0103 nu resping\u0103 persoanele de sex opus. F\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 vrea, vor atrage situa\u021bii \u00een care sunt respin\u0219i pe plan sexual sau se priveaz\u0103 singuri de sexualitate;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Deoarece se respinge pe el \u00eensu\u0219i, se respinge \u00een existen\u021ba lui, sabot\u00e2ndu-\u0219i practic via\u021ba, realiz\u0103rile, bucuriile;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Fugarul se maturizeaz\u0103 repede, nu-\u0219i atribuie dreptul de a fi copil, poate a\u0219a va sup\u0103ra mai pu\u021bin \u0219i nu va fi respins;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 P\u0103rintele de acela\u015fi sex are rolul de a ne \u00eenv\u0103\u0163a s\u0103 iubim, s\u0103 ne iubim \u015fi s\u0103 d\u0103ruim iubire. P\u0103rintele de sex opus ne \u00eenva\u0163\u0103 cum s\u0103 ne l\u0103s\u0103m iubi\u0163i \u015fi cum s\u0103 primim iubirea.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 S\u0103 \u0219tii c\u0103 ai dreptul s\u0103 exi\u0219ti!<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: right;\"><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Psiholog clinician \u2013 psihoterapeut<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\"> Antoanela \u2013 Carmen\u00a0Cogian<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-family: Gabriola; font-size: 24px;\">Copierea sau reproducerea f\u0103r\u0103 men\u021bionarea sursei este strict interzis\u0103!<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Rana de respingere este prima ran\u0103 care poate apare \u00een via\u021ba noastr\u0103, \u00eenc\u0103 din perioada intrauterin\u0103, c\u00e2nd copilul poate interioriza emo\u021biile tr\u0103ite de mam\u0103 \u00een leg\u0103tur\u0103 cu venirea lui pe lume. <br \/>\n <a class=\"read-more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/2018\/05\/12\/frica-de-respingere-sau-atunci-cand-nimeni-nu-ma-vrea\/\">READ MORE<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":411,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[17,16,15,21],"class_list":["post-410","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dezvoltare-personala","tag-antoanela-carmen-cogian","tag-iasi","tag-psihoterapeut-iasi","tag-respingere"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/Frica-de-respingere-sau-atunci-cand-nimeni-nu-ma-vrea.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/410","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=410"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/410\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":412,"href":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/410\/revisions\/412"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/411"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=410"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=410"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/psihologterapeutiasi.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=410"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}